Kristoffer worried about feeling like his daughter’s “real” father
For both Nina and the Schönberg family, needing a sperm donor was a natural consequence of their life situation.
For Sabrina and Kristoffer, it was a shock and a sorrow to learn that Kristoffer wouldn’t be able to contribute to the biological makeup of their future child.
“Being bisexual, I thought I had ended on the easiest path to kiddos by marrying a guy. It just wasn’t so. The things we had thought would be easy, they were hard and quite unromantic. Not only choosing a donor online the way you shop for shoes or leggings but going through fertility treatments. Lots and lots of fertility treatments. It seemed anything but easy,” Sabrina recalls.
Kristoffer had to come to terms with being infertile, and he went through therapy before they tried to conceive with donor sperm.
“I worried about not being her “real” father a lot,” Kristoffer says.
That worry has fortunately been put to shame after Meta was born. For the first part of her life Kristoffer was very aware of making a sharp distinction between him and the donor, as he felt insecure about his role.
“But simply being with her for so long and seeing her accept me as the dad for so long has completely obliterated that uncertainty and insecurity,” he says.
And speaking to the other families, Sabrina found that all insecurities about biological links were put to shame after birth.
“You feel like a real family because you are a real family. How else would you explain all the love along with the constant Lego on the floor?” she says.