The big decision to have fertility treatment
As Sabrina and Kristoffer are trying to navigate their new reality, they decide to be open about their situation. They quickly tell their friends and family, and they are met with support and understanding. Along with the openness, new insights come to the surface. Namely, the number of stories they hear about other couples in their network who struggle with fertility issues.
“There are so many people who need help to get pregnant. Why are we not talking about it? Especially when it is such a widespread problem? Perhaps our openness can help others,” Kristoffer and Sabrina reflect, as they are facing the crisis of their lives.
They experience first-hand that the taboo surrounding infertility is alive and well. There may be a turning point coming, but there is still a long way to go.
“The topic is so sensitive and private, and that is why we have a tendency to not share it with anyone. As a society, we are still very much influenced by the stereotypes of what a real man is. The idea is that a real man can father children. Therefore, I, and many others, can't be a real man. It is harmful on so many levels,” Kristoffer says.
The couple spend the following months picking themselves back up, and both of them go to therapy. Sabrina is quick to announce that she is open to using a sperm donor. Kristoffer, on the other hand, needs time to think about it. After four months, they are about ready to make a big decision. They reach the conclusion that their dream of having children is more important than passing on Kristoffer’s genes.